“I am a raving Euro-Federalist… a Pro-European of the most violent, dyspeptic and incurable disposition.” Boris Johnson (1999) Life in the Fast Lane.
This is a second contribution to the photo challenge EDIT from GC and my site Weekly Prompts. It is also linked to Fandango’s Saturday prompt Movement
With many in the Conservative Party moving towards making Boris Johnson the next Prime Minister of the U.K. I decided to find out what Private Eye had to say about it.
Private Eye is a U.K. news and current affairs publication, it’s a magazine I read from time to time, and usually from cover to cover, there’s always something in there to make me smile. I’m also a great fan of its editor, Ian Hislop. I was thinking of asking Santa for a subscription, but I’m not sure I can wait that long.
Talking of the cover, take a look at the current one, this brought forth a bit of a giggle from me!
Page 25 began with this image, and I’ve included an extract below. No, I did not type it word for word, I’m not that daft, I read it out loud while dictating to my iPad, and naturally, I had to edit a few typos /misheard words!
Dear concerned stakeholders,
The appointment of the new headteacher continues to prove a challenge, particularly in the light of last weekend’s unfortunate events, i.e. a domestic incident involving one of the candidates Mr Johnson.
We have obviously talked to Mr Johnson about this and he has categorically refused to comment. He says this is none of our business, that it is an entirely private matter and that we should focus entirely on his plans to make the school great again.
When we asked how exactly he would make the school great again, he refused to comment saying that this was none of our business.
This was a very satisfactory response and we, as governors, see no reason to dwell on this irrelevant issue any further.
Yes the police were called, but no one was charged and there was no crime committed except by Mr Johnson’s ghastly trouble-making hippy layabout neighbours. The unsavoury nosy-parkers quite clearly infringed Mr Johnson’s privacy by recording him exercising his perfect right to throw wine over sofas, smash plates, slam doors and let off some steam in the sanctity of someone else’s flat.
Voices may have been raised and the odd swear word used, but is this not a laudable example of Mr Johnson’s passion? A passion which could be used to unite the school, heal the rifts and bring stability to this great institution, by having a row with our friends in the European Education Union and telling them to get off my F****** laptop or words to that effect.
For those of you who still harbour doubts about the suitability of Mr Johnson, we, as Governors, are happy to offer an alternative candidate – Mr Johnson.
This Mr Johnson is a first-rate member of staff, who has impressed with his vision, creativity and imagination.
Once again, a few ill-wishers have suggested that this man is actually a serial liar who has repeatedly been dismissed from previous jobs for telling lies.
Mr Johnson assures us that this is not only not true but an inverted pyramid of piffling poppycock. He says it is total whiff-whaff and that his words have always been taken out of context – which is a fair point, if you put them back in context, they look even worse!
Boris is great fodder for the comedians, and I get the feeling that if Boris were to become Prime Minister, Ian Hislop will on the one hand be shaking his head in despair and on the other rubbing his hands with glee!
(C) SueW-nansfarm.net 2019 Photo Challenge Edit from Weekly Prompts – Fandango’s one word prompt Movement.