A magazine popped through my letterbox today, and adorning the front cover was a picture of a retired gentleman. From this point I will refer to him as the model.
The assumption that he was retired was an easy one to make seeing as the magazine was sent to me from my late husband’s pension company, and featured a subtitle of ‘Re-think Retirement.’
The insurance/pension company has new owners and today was the first time I’ve received a magazine.
Back to the cover – The model wore a woolly pull on hat, scarf and thick top coat. My next assumption was that the photo of the model must have been taken in winter, unless the writer assumes that once we are retired we all dress extra warm in spring!
The model also wore a camera slung around his neck, nothing wrong with that, I myself hardly go anywhere without my camera dangling from my neck.
Another thing that struck me was that the model was not attractive, and I couldn’t help thinking that if the magazine had been directed at a younger generation, the model here would have been much easier on the eye than this one.
Anyway, I poured a cup of tea and seated myself on my new rocking bench on the patio and proceeded to flick through the magazine. (more about the bench later)
One of the articles commiserated about the way retirees may feel, “Perhaps some of you are lonely and miss the workplace and camaraderie.” It then advised taking up a hobby.
“It doesn’t mean you need to take up something drastic such as knitting or hiking!” At this point I became amused, because it’s not often I read the words hiking and knitting in the same sentence, and what’s wrong with knitting anyway?
Next, it advised becoming a volunteer or helping out at a school, the PTA, or even becoming a school governor. Well, I’ve already done all that and I’m not about to start again.
When I retired from school, our local vicar suggested I use my computer skills/knowledge and continue to teach, but instead of children I should focus on seniors. I can only guess at the look of absolute horror that must have passed across my face.
Teaching seniors computing, was she mad? I was once given the task of staff training, bringing the teaching assistants’ computer skills up-to-date. All I’ll say is give me a class of thirty children any day!
The final piece of advice from the magazine was “Invite your friends around for a cup of tea, it could be just what the doctor ordered!” How patronising, and an assumption that those of us of a certain age no longer socialise!
Going back to my new rocking bench – Last week during one of my many visits to the local garden centre, I happened across an older gentleman examining the rocking bench that I’d recently purchased.
Now because I’m friendly and helpful, I flashed my usual beaming smile and said, “I purchased this last week and it’s much easier to put together than it looks.” He gave me a steely stare and said “My wife’s over there!”
Ooh this is awkward I thought to myself and I can only imagine he believed I was attempting to pick him up, unless of course, his wife possesses superior DIY skills to his and was the one I should have been addressing!
My daughter who was patiently waiting for me to cease hitting on old men, was quite amused by this, and as we walked away remarked “I hope you told him ‘In your dreams mate!
© SueW-nansfarm.net May 2018 In response to the word-prompt Awkward